Yesterday was pretty busy but not too bad altogether. I’d stayed up all of Sunday night and Ryan and I took a nap together in the late morning/early afternoon. We awoke and did some much needed shopping – pants for me and groceries for us.

We’d planned to buy my plane tickets and tickets to DisneySea in April, but ITT must’ve been closed because of the holiday. President’s Day, was it? I hate gov’t holidays!

We wound up seeing Aliens Vs Predator 2 – wait! Aliens Vs Predator: Requiem. My bad. -rolls eyes-

Ryan liked this one a lot better than the original AVP and, for that, all I can say is I’m sorry. I’m sorry aliens, on behalf of the human race, for the horrendous atrocity that is this flick. I’m sorry humans, on behalf of Hollywood (of which I am not even a part!) for this atrocious waste of time we dare call a ‘movie.’ I’m sorry to the actors who are in such dire straights that they were forced to be in such a wreck! I’m sorry I wanted to see this more than Cloverfield. I was wrong. Deadly wrong.

Let me preface this review by saying I’ve only seen the original Alien, during which I fell asleep (sorry Ryan!) and I haven’t seen any of the Predators movie or AVP. It’s not that I don’t want to – I like a good flick like that sometimes; it’s just that all those movies are notoriously bad or known for being or an era of notoriously bad “horror” flicks.

Unsurprisingly, AVP bombed. I thought that it had a nice premise, as did many, many others but everyone was universally unimpressed, even appalled. Surprisingly, the previews for AVPR made it seem as though it were the redemption of the first. Although it wouldn’t make it any better, it might pave the way for a decent series. The previews lied but should be really be so surprised? Face offs like Freddy vs Jason were also notoriously bad!

For starters, the premise is pretty simple. Aliens, a viral like alien species whose strength lies in its numbers, have infected a predator, an advanced, humanoid alien species with computer technology, creating the “predalien” (though I think aliendor sounds better, whatever). The ship on which this happens crash lands on Earth. The predator hates aliens and now the spawn of both horrific species and is on the hunt for all aliens and the predalien.

But wait! Both forces kill humans. I bet you didn’t see that coming, did you?!

So this movie is about aliens creating more aliens by killing human hosts, aliens fighting the predator and subsequently dying, and the predator killing humans on his quest for supreme dominance (I guess? I mean, I get why he’s dead set against the aliens but maybe I should have watched the original Predator to understand just why he wants to kill us, too?) which ultimately involves his desire to kill the predalien. There’s some humans who want to live but that doesn’t seem likely.

This isn’t the kind of movie you expect to win an Oscar; it’s the type of movie you expect to have some nice fights, some blood (human and alien!), some explosions and lots of “shoot ’em up” scenes. Generally, the movie provides the viewer with all of that; however, it’s only the bare minimum. There could be more fighting, more shooting, more blood and bigger, better explosions!

Most of the fighting is one obviously superior side, usually the predator, against a foe that has no chance, frequently aliens and humans. The fighting is only exciting during the last 10 or so minutes of the movie where the predator faces off against the predalien.

The shooting and explosions are small uneventful, or as uneventful as explosions can actually be. I think our movie theatre did this no justice because the explosions were literally quieter than other sounds effects of the movie.

The humans, which start out a group of small townspeople, eventually dwindle away as aliens, the predator and predalien and other humans pluck them mercilessly from the land of the dead. This movie isn’t about them, I know, but I didn’t feel particularly attached to any of the humans, even the survivors (of course there are some), save for the little girl, some babies and the dog, who isn’t quite a person, as Ryan let me know.

In that note, I was slightly offended by how easily Hollywood writes off a whole nursery of babies (preadtor got ’em) and a wing of pregnant woman (aliens killed ’em and use ’em to spawn babies). I generally consider everyone an equal target but this made me uneasy, especially with how graphic it was when it came to the pregnant women. I guess this is to be expected but I would have preferred it otherwise. Ryan feels the pregnant women part, at least, shows how so many aliens spawned but I don’t think it was necessary to explain the number of aliens; there are so many because they spawn like a virus. It’s just what they do.

The script, as little as there was (I guess the predator doesn’t speak English and the aliens are just dumb) was forced and would have been better written by my 5 year old sister. I could say the script was “to the point” and “minimal” but I feel that would be giving it too much credit.

For instance, during a scene where the sheriff and his deputy our scouring the local forest after a human hand has been found the a dog, via radio. (Roughly, from memory)

Deputy: Anyone up at the point?
Sheriff: Yea, Buddy Benson’s car.
Deputy: Crap. He usually goes hunting with his kid.

It sets it up so the whole town can become worried about a dad and his kid but the viewer doesn’t care. In fact, we want them to die. That’s the point of this movie, isn’t it? My bone to pick is with the writing of the story. Finding the car is a bit cliche but I’ll let it pass. I cannot stand aside when the psychic deputy remembers that Buddy always goes hunting with his son. No creativity given to the lines, they’re just enough to get by and force a laugh out of you with the “strategically” placed jokes – like when they poke fun at the gov’t (the gov’t would never lie to us!).

It’s these same types of exchange which paint the town as a small American place with its local sheriff yet, when Buddy and his son go missing, the mother/wife has to post up signs and show people her family. If it’s a town as small as they try to portray, would this be necessary?

But it must be small considering how fast they move from one place to another. It’s quite disorienting how the scenes jump from setting to setting and it’s clear this town is about as well thought out as the rest of the movie. It might help show that the predator is a skilled and sentient hunter, or it might just make you busy.

The special effects? Not so special. Period. Explosions too small.

As a final thought, I found that all the monsters blended in. The predator was easiest to recognize with his hardware but all the aliens and the predalien looked alike. I was never quite sure whether the predator was fighting just another alien or the super creature.

My final thoughts? Skip it. You won’t be scared or on the edge of your seat. You won’t see any great fights, and there’s only 1 decent one. The script is poor and matches the acting resulting in characters with whom the audience feels no connection. The effects are boring, nothing spectacular. Nothing in this movie stands out, it is all around mediocrity and will soon be forgotten like most movies.

I haven’t much discussed the election and presidental candidates here but I have been thinking about it and following it (although not as closely as I should). I made my decision to back Obama quite a while ago, for several reasons including his track record of accomlpishments despite his short time in office and young age.

Obama recently pulled ahead of Clinton in the race which gives me hope that he can be the Democratic candidate. The numbers were close, with Clinton leading my a small margin for most of the race and although Obama is now ahead, I don’t want to count my eggs before they hatch; he’s only ahead by a tiny margin.

I’m also excited because I received my absentee ballot last night. I was afraid I’d signed up too late because my local ballot arrived the other day by itself but it just took longer for my primary ballot.

I wonder how many people here have signed up for absentee ballots? Ryan hasn’t. Tsk.

I finally got around to adding some tutorials (for PSP) I wrote up a while ago and had posted elsewhere on the internet.

If you head on over to the tutorials, you’ll find some new ones:

• Basic Text Effects
• Perspective Text
• Sparkles
• Text from an Image Selection
• Keep Clarity when Resizing
• Cutout Text

I also did a major overhaul on the Image Optimization and Compression tutorial.

Names have interested me, the origin and methodology of naming things (also known as nomenclature) and especially as of late. I had a customer whose name was Cutlip not too long ago and I surmised aloud that someone in his ancestor must have a good story about it and while he agreed it would be interesting he did not know it.

Many names are based on ancestral names – Anything-son indicates that someone’s father was named Anything and common names such as Carpenter and Smith throwback so a family occupation. Ever wonder why there are so many smiths (it is the most common name in United Kingdom, Australia, New Zealand and the United States,)? Countless careers ended in Smith: Locksmith, blacksmith, goldsmith, silversmith to name a few, all of whom worked with metals in a smithy.

My own maiden name which I thought to be the rough equivalent of the German word for “short” although uncannily accurate to describe most of the people in my family, present company included, may actually be more closely related to the German name Conrad which means “brave counsel”. However, that does seem more incongruous than the previous theory. Though my married name is far less exciting simply meaning “Son of Martin.” Do you know the origin of your own name?

This interest also extends to a general interest in language and linguistics including pre- and post-fixes as well as word origins. This curiosity and the ability to understand the English language which accompanies it might explain why I’m rather good at FreeRice.com (a great site which donates rice to the poor with every synonym you correctly name).

Enough of my geeky love for language! We’ll return to the normal discursive programming next time.

Not too much is going on. I suppose life has slowed down as snow has blanketed the Earth leaving everything literally and metaphorically quiet.

I received my bear, Jack, in the mail the other day. He came complete with an air hole in the box and a bear shaped chocolate snack. The box itself was even creative (besides the air hole) with the inside containing a board game, the story of the first teddy bear and a list of “Things To Do With This Box.” I must say I am impressed with the company. A Vermont Teddy Bear would be perfect for kids of all ages.

Jack himself is impressive. He’s a bit more stiff than I would like but still cuddly and his fur is soft. He’s a gorgeous shade of blue and his attire is impressive made up of velvet and brocade with intricate details on his cap (in the traditional night stocking), jacket and adorable little boots – all of which can be removed when you need to put him in the washing machine to clean (gentle cycle, in a pillow case).

I recently finished The Color of Magic, the first Discworld book by Terry Pratchett. Although short, it was really a fast read. It’s satirical and irreverent without being wordy, poking fun at many fantasy cliches which have dominated the genre for years. Yet, Pratchett uses some of these himself as well as some creative techniques. I’ll admit that some things we simply cannot wrap our heads around because they are so fantastic! Often, his style reminds me of the late Douglas Adams whose series The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy has been a favourite of mine since I first discovered it in middle school.

The novel starts quickly with a great city afire (though Pratchett assures us it will rebuild as it always has) which as been accidentally started by one of the main characters, Twoflower who begins the novel by fleeing said city with his newfound companion Rincewind “the Wizard” who has actually flunked out of wizardry school and isn’t much of a magic handler at all.

The book flashes back to their acquaintanceship where Rincewind discovers Twoflower (and his mysterious sentient chest of Luggage), a visitor to Rincewind’s home city Ankh-Morpork (the first ever tourist on Discworld) and follows them on their coming journey which eventually leads them to the end of the world, literally.

Rincewind and Twoflower live on Discworld, literally a disc sitting on the backs of 4 elephants who themselves sit on the back of a giant turtle (gender unknown which is quite the curiosity to Discworld inhabitants). In such a world, direction is measured in relation to the rim of the disc (rimward) or hub (hubward).

Though they battle the original fire, common thieves, a soul eating monster, imagined dragons who reside in an upside down mountain with their quarreling family of royal imaginers, and eventually end up in Krull at the edge of the world, while avoiding saying the number 8 (which Pratchett also avoids saying by describing it any number of round-about ways) which is closely associated with magic, Octarine (the eighth color, that of magic) and all-things-generally-unpleasant as Rincewind repeatedly eludes the none-too-happy-about-it Death, they remain generally unscathed.

Or do they? I recommend you try this book out and see for yourself (as do countless editors, critics and journalists whose opinions of Pratchett and his works who preface this novel)!