So I’m tying up loose ends before my trip. I packed most of my clothes but a lot of things I’ll use tomorrow yet. I finished most of my cleaning as well and my last day of work was today. I’ve been trying to use up most of the fresh foods but still have one roast that we haven’t been able to use and will probably go to waste, especially because there’s a small chance they may move us while I’m gone.

I just sent out the mail including my credit card bill which is quite low after this last payment so I have a nice cushion if I spend more than I intend to in Wausau.

I’m also trying to finish online things like icon requests and the pictures section of this site. I’ll be able to work on the site at Mom’s but not anything graphic related.

I spent several hours tonight at a Partylite party hosted by a friend of mine. Most of the other ladies there wound up being wives of men who work with Ryan, coincidentally. Partylite has a lot of nice stuff but the prices can be steep, especially when you can find them on Ebay for so much cheaper which I think I will do.

Speaking of Ebay, I purchased some sunglasses in late January and they’re not here yet. There were some communication issues with the seller and they were not mailed off until the 25 of February but that’s been some time and unless Ryan happened to get them in the mail earlier today, I’ll not have them for my entire break with is ridiculous. Every time we’re outside in the sun I say something like “You know what would be awesome right now? Sunglasses” which I’m sure Ryan is sick of hearing.

Tomorrow will be mostly relaxing – trying to spend as much time as possible with Ryan, lunch with a friend to give her baby presents, packing, the last of the cleaning and a load of laundry.

I can’t believe I leave so soon!

I am slowly-but-surely changing the format of all the pictures pages on the site (again). So far I’m focusing on pictures other than of myself and I’ve updated or create pages for Amanda, Samantha, Pets, Past Pets and Family.

I also just finished the pages for Tokyo 2007, Halloween 2005 and Ryusendo Caves.

Actually, it’s not easy being a friend or caring about people when you see them making the same mistakes. There’s some people in my life right now making repeated mistakes and while most people tend to fall into a pattern or routine (sometimes negative) in any aspect of life, I’m seeing it frequently in the terms of relationships – whether it’s a cycle of mistakes in one relationship or making the same errors in a series of relationships.

It’s hard when I can see what seems to be obvious and I want to advise someone as much as possible but know I can’t make them do anything even if it’s for the best. Sometimes I just want to scream these obvious things at them but they’d probably just look like a deer in headlight. “Break up with him,” “Don’t let her do that to you,” “How could you not see it coming?” “You’re only thinking about yourself,” “Your SO doesn’t care about your feelings,” “You’re letting your heart take control” or “You’re just plain stupid” are all the types of things running through my head as I try, as nicely as possible, to tell people they’re being idiots.

But they’re not psychic and they don’t hear. They’re too caught up in the drama to see where it’s not worth it or to see where it is and I can’t make anyone do anything so I just remain frustrated.

1. We have hair in unfeminine places…
and if you notice it, that’s great but you don’t need to speak up. It’s extremely likely that, yes, we are already aware and that we’re hoping you won’t notice or we’re in between treatments (read removal or bleaching). Women don’t just shave their underarms and legs; stomaches, backs, butts, feet, chests and faces all have hair that can be a little more persistent than peach fuzz and we’d rather do without. If you luck out and end up being with one of the women who doesn’t give a rats ass and likes to leave it natural, good for you but the majority of us secretly deal with these hair issues and that’s that.

2. Beauty takes time..
and if you knew half of what many of us feel “needs” to be done, you’d be a bit more understanding. Instead of being a dick and saying something like “You look fine, let’s go already!” why not try “You are so naturally beautiful” as we just step out of the shower, instead. The aforementioned hair, skin cleansing, make up application, slipping into undergarments both protective and shaping as well as the actual dressing and the fine tuning are what make the complete package. Celebrities don’t naturally look like that and neither do we but it feels good to know that we can. Is it so bad if we always want to put out best face out there?

3. Women burp, fart, poop and pee..
just like the rest of the world, and just because we are women, doesn’t mean it’s dainty; it can be nasty. We would appreciate if you both didn’t freak out about it one you realize this and also don’t make it into some sort of party. Grow up and accept that it happens but don’t encourage us to do so (unless we’ve given you some sign that we’re into that sort of thing and we usually don’t).

4. Women like sex..
perhaps just as much as men and as often. We like to experiment, we like it rough, we like it with no strings attached and we like it a certain way. It doesn’t mean we’re freaks or perverted and wanting a guy to actually do something to get us off doesn’t make us bossy. It doesn’t mean we don’t also want to make love but don’t be afraid to spank or pull hair or talk dirty.

5. Women like porn…
because we like to see good looking people and get off by ourselves, too. Stop gaping and accept it.

6. We won’t break but we’re not one of the guys
We’re strong too and many of us strive to prove that we’re just as strong as you. But this doesn’t mean that we’re not different. We can take criticism but, yes, sometimes it will make us cry. We like rough sex but that doesn’t mean we want to wrestle with you. We may be emotional sometimes but we’re also here to take care of you when you’re upset. While you should treat us better than your buddies and not go out of your way to hurt us (mentally, physically or emotionally) you also shouldn’t go out of your way to protect us; we know the world’s hard and we like the challenge (and rough sex).

7. Women want you to be a man..
and just because we can change the oil, fix the sink, move the furniture, program the VCR, beat you at sports and drink you under the table, doesn’t mean we want to all the time. Women are stronger than they used to be and it means men should be stronger than they used to be. Unless you’re with some radical feminist who, by some reason, isn’t a lesbian, we want you to open doors, open jars and hold umbrellas. We want you to be a shoulder we can cry on, sometimes, without having to deal with your tears, too (there’s some for those later, I promise). “I’ll never be good enough” is not an excuse to not try and never will be!

Social class and perception – 2 ideas that don’t usually go hand on hand, except when I’m talking.

I had always perceived my family to be lower middle class. We certainly weren’t any higher but we were doing abut as well as most people I knew and, in my mind, I equated average with middle class. I definitely was envious of those with more money but was a firsthand witness to the hard work necessary to put food on the table, especially in my early teen years when my single mother was trying to support the both of us after just having left her husband.

We saw some improvement after Mom married Tim. For once, there were 2 working adults compared to a single parent or how it had been with Mom’s ex-husband who worked when he wasn’t too lazy in a very unstable profession. I hesitate to call him an entrepreneur but he did “own his own company” in the very lightest sense of the term. Whether we had any money depended on whether he wanted to work that day which often wasn’t the case and was never a good idea in the field he was in.

But things looked up, not much but we always had a roof over our heads and food to eat plus little perks here or there. I reveled at having my own money when I was working part time in high school. I partook in shopping to an extent I’d never had to chance to explore, before; even though it really wasn’t much. I could choose what I wanted and when and, since it was my own money, my purchases were mine and mine alone.

i think that little taste of freedom led me to feel very restricted by the financial situation I’d known all my life. As I graduated, started working full time and moved out, and found myself with money to spend, I continued to do so, more than before but only what I could afford. And what I could afford, I realized, was more than what we could afford before even though I was only working as a cashier. It only occurred to me what the reality of the situation was after I’d been removed from it.

And it’s interesting that what had been average was much lower than I realized. What I had considered middle class, was in fact, working class. What I had considered to be well off was more along the lines of middle class because my perception had been skewed. All of this, of course, I only just found out recently as I had been browsing Wikipedia pages on American classes.

But I’m not the exception. I think that people tend to spend greater amounts of time with others of similar classes and thus their children will also spend time with people in similar situations and they tend to assume it’s the norm. Only when removed from the situation can people see that yes, that is indeed the norm or, no, it’s actually lower or higher than the norm.

And once you’re out on your own without support from your parents anymore, it doesn’t really matter. You start at the bottom and, hopefully, work yourself up to the standard that you are most comfortable with. But whether you’re effective at saving and budgeting can certainly revolve around the perceptions you develop about money from a young age.

I think it does us all good to have our perceptions challenged from time to time.