• if you put your headphones in your nose and play your ipod really loudly, you can hear the music through your mouth when it’s open, and can’t hear it when it’s closed.
• The Magic 8 ball comes with a warning label which says “Not intended as a substitute for a human pregnancy test.”
• Thomas Edison was afraid of the dark.
• “If you watch jaws backwards its about a huge shark that throws up so many people that they need to open a beach.”
• Microsoft Word puts the red squiggly line under “Ravenclaw” “Hufflepuff” and “Slytherin” … but not “Gryffindor”
• you can mail a banana as is. All you do is write the address and place a stamp on it and then put it in the mailbox.
• Apparently someone donated their land in the case that a unicorn ever needed a safe refuge.
• if you say ‘beer can’ with an English accent, you’re saying ‘bacon’ with a Jamaican accent.
• a pumpkin with the number 3.14 carved into it would make it a pumpkin pi.
• Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don’t make sense. Refrigerator.

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