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For as long as I can remember, I’ve already slept on the right side of the bed. That is, when you’re facing it, I’m on your left. When I’m in it, the right. I did this before I was married, and I continued to do it with Ryan. In fact, when I moved to Japan, I tried to sleep on the other side, but it gave me such anxiety that I didn’t get a wink those first few days. We switch it up, and I was happy. After moving home, I continued the trend, never moving to the middle of the bed. There’s always been a right side of the bed for me.

Unfortunately for me, my window is not on that side of the bed. It opens to the other side, which means I don’t really get the benefit of cool night air, so I’ve started to taking to sleeping on the wrong side of the bed. Only, now, it doesn’t feel quite so wrong. It feels a little cooler, and it certainly was strange at first, but I’m sleeping as well as I can for sleeping in a 90-degree room.

It won’t stick. I’ll be glad to go back to the “right” side, but it’s interesting that it doesn’t bother me so much now. I wonder what happened.

It is 4:26 and I am newly showered. I am waiting for Wendy to awake but I realize that she may not work at her usual time. So, I am sitting here in a towel, listening to the quiet hum of my laptop. It is very calming and I realize that I have not been in a place where I could simply listen to it hum away. Wendy’s computer is ridiculously loud–so loud that you can easily hear it down the hall, in the bedroom. My laptop hums away; although, sometimes it is nearly silent.

It’s a shame that I do not take solace in the comforting and familiar sounds around me more often. The narrator of my relaxation CD tells me to do this as I fall asleep and, I must admit, the CD is more effective now than ever. Where I used to listen to it all the way through, and be wide awake, I am falling asleep with no concept of how long I have been listening to it. And sleeping through the night without so many awakenings. The result? I am sleeping far less than I used to. Perhaps still more than your average person (although, I have nothing on your average bear).

Now to get on a normal sleeping schedule because, as you can guess, it is quite abnormal for me to be awake at 4:26 in the morning and I won’t even make it to 8 o’clock tonight. I didn’t last night. That’s okay. I sleep much more soundly when it is dark. Luckily, Wisconsin offers me around sixteen hours of darkness every day and it certainly messes with one’s inner clock–especially if one is not awake during the few hours of light. This is also why I want to adjust my schedule.

But, for now, it is 4:41 and I am calmed by the sound of my laptop and that is all I need.

I spend a lot of time sleeping on the couch. Not because we’re fighting but because I find it hard to sleep in bed so many nights. After sleepless minutes turn into hours, there comes a point when I can no longer sleep in bed. I know I will not fall asleep in that room and I head to the couch. It’s like there’s some sort of bad karma floating around the room from not being able to fall asleep and I need a clean sweep in another room, on another piece of furniture. If I stay and somehow do manage to fall asleep, it will be fitful and restless.

Sometimes I think it hurts Ryan’s feelings but it has nothing to do with him. It’s feng shui or maybe just superstitious. I don’t know why; I just know I have to move so I do. Then I fall asleep peacefully on the couch. At least until the cats bother me and I go back to the bed where the bad karma has cleared.

Actually, I disagree. I love to sleep. I would rather get lots of good sleep than socialize, sometimes. However, sometimes I just sleep because I feel like there’s no reason to get up which is a bit depressing.

Because I don’t have many commitments, my sleep schedule is well, not very routine at all. Especially as of late. I pretty much wake up whenever and stay up until I’m dead tired. When Ryan is home, I usually wake up in the early afternoon and go to bed pretty late but it’s been even more unusual since I got back from Wausau. I’ve gone to bed at 5 or 7 in the evening a coupe times and I’ve woken anywhere from 6:30 in the morning to 5 in the evening. It’s really all over the place.

Generally, I try to be awake around the time when the mail comes so I can check the box but that’s the only thing I really must be awake to do so I just sleep when my body calls for it and wake when I cannot sleep anymore. Sometimes, I wake up and realize there’s no reason to be up and go back to sleep.

I think that I will be glad to get back on any schedule once Ryan comes home.