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Yesterday I paged through m CD cases and popped in a burned CD or two that I hadn’t listened to in years. Both of them were pop songs and it was an interesting blast from the past. I had 3 distinct reactions to the songs that played:

1. I remembered the song but no longer like it quite so much (or at all)
2. I remembered the song and still like it (although I listen to/still have very few of them)
3. I didn’t remember the song at all but thought “Hey, why don’t I still listen to this?”

Of course, songs that fall into the last group are songs that the world probably doesn’t remember so much, either and they no longer get any airplay. Also, I’m a really bad album “producer”. Even though all the songs were pop, there was no flow whatsoever. LOL It spanned many variances of pop (bubblegum, R&B and rock).

So, if you’re curious what I liked in high school and still do, here’s two that come to mind – with links to video. I’ll also be uploading my song download page.

• Collective Soul – Why, Pt. 2
• Barenaked Ladies – The Old Apartment

I love Christmas. I love music and while I prefer the classics like “Winter Wonderland” and “White Christmas” performed in their classic way by almost anyone (Elvis, Reba, Alan Jackson, and Eurythmics are a few I love), I also love newer jingles and artists like Sarah Mclachlan, Trans-Siberian Orchestra and Shedaisy who put their own original spin on them. Of course, I love to sing along.

I love Christmas movies, especially all the clay-mation ones. Santa Claus is Coming to Town and Rudolph the Rednose Reindeer are probably my favourites but I also love Home Alone.

I love to decorate and given the resources (time, money, perfect decorations and a house which is suitable) I would probably be one of those people who lights up the entire neighbourhood. I love to put up a tree and there isn’t anything like the real thing.

I love the big meal including ham and potatoes. I love seeing family and friends even if it means drama. I love the hustle and bustle and even like Christmas shopping – when I have money – no matter how frustrating.

I love gift giving and gift opening, even if it’s something silly. I still hang stockings (although ours hang empty tonight) and if I ever have children, I will tell them about Santa Claus. Last night I tracked him via Norad until 3 in the morning (and he wasn’t even done!)

While I do not consider myself a religious person, the holiday season makes me feel “closer to God” and everything around me seems to sparkle. Of course, if there actually is snow sparkling aruond me, that is a plus.

But it’s so easy to go through the motions of Christmas and not take any joy from it. It’s easy to forget what it’s about, even if it’s only about gifts to you but, hey!, those are as good a reason as any in my opinion.

I had been so disappointed in Christmas this year. It wasn’t feeling like Christmas and this made me frustrated ans sad. I know I’m not the only one but I wanted to be in the Christmas spirit so bad I was doing myself a disservice.

I feel a better today even though things aren’t perfect. I guess I forgot that Christmas is more than just a sum of its parts. Its something else entirely and while it might be extra special if everything comes together perfectly, it’s not unspecial just because it doesn’t.

So, with that, Merry Christmas! I hope you got what you want and – if you didn’t – I hope that’s okay, too.

I just burned a cd.. here’s the track listing
1. Cold – No One
2. Jack Off Jull – Cumdumpster
3. A Perfect Circle – Magdalena
4. Abandoned Pools – The Remedy
5. Nirvana – Lithium
6. Filter- Trip Like I Do
7. Bile – Happiness In Slavey
8. Katatonia – For My Demons
9. Katatonia – I Am Nothing
10. Amorphis – Divinity
11. Nevermore – Narcosynthesis
12. Sinch – Pain
13. Chevelle – The Red
14. The Cult – Painted on My Heart
15. A Perfect Circle – Brena
16. Familiar 48 – The Question
17. Jack Off Jill -Star No Star
18. Cold – Send in the Clowns

(bah! “for my demons” wasnt the whole song but ive got it on another cd anyway)i <3 this cd