Category Archives: Thoughts

Monday, Ryan went in to the dentist and, by the time he left, had an appointment for Tuesday to have his wisdom teeth pulled. Talk about short notice but it was the only open slot if Ryan wanted to have it done before leaving the Air Force. I wasn’t super excited about driving back or waiting while he was in oral surgery but I did and survived the drive with no major mishaps. While waiting, I dived into another book and finished 150 pages. A good chunk, if I do say so myself.

After returning home, Ryan was plenty silly and using his gauze-stuffed mouth to say ridiculous things to make me laugh. He napped during the afternoon and goes back to work on Saturday. He keeps saying things like “There’s just so much room in my mouth now; I feel like I can take on the world.” I don’t understand but be careful, mmkay?

Anyway, I think I had more to say but I guess not. Tune in next time!

I enjoyed you dear November. I had fun doing NabloPoMo. Alas, we must part and make way for Christmas spirit.

When I consider my closest friends, most of them have been friends since high school (freshman year, with the exception of Wendy) and I still speak to most of my circle of friends from 6th grade, the first year of middle school. On the one hand, it’s great to know people so well, to still talk to them and to be able to reminisce. On the other hand, it seems like the bonds that held together friendships so many years ago were so much weaker than I now require. It’s difficult not to grow apart when we have all grown into separate people.

It’s not that my friends are bad people or even boring or anything sort of negative trait; we simply don’t have all that much in common and/or I just don’t feel the way about them I used to. Yet it’s so hard to say good bye when friendships seem to be so difficult to make at this point in life. I can count the number of friends I’ve made in the last 2 or 3 years on one hand (Dez and Lars being the foremost). I find myself biting my tongue and holding on to friendships, trying dearly to focus on the good times we do have together (no matter how limited) and memories made, ignoring the elephant in the room. Perhaps it is time to let go and it doesn’t have to be a bad thing.

I spend a lot of time sleeping on the couch. Not because we’re fighting but because I find it hard to sleep in bed so many nights. After sleepless minutes turn into hours, there comes a point when I can no longer sleep in bed. I know I will not fall asleep in that room and I head to the couch. It’s like there’s some sort of bad karma floating around the room from not being able to fall asleep and I need a clean sweep in another room, on another piece of furniture. If I stay and somehow do manage to fall asleep, it will be fitful and restless.

Sometimes I think it hurts Ryan’s feelings but it has nothing to do with him. It’s feng shui or maybe just superstitious. I don’t know why; I just know I have to move so I do. Then I fall asleep peacefully on the couch. At least until the cats bother me and I go back to the bed where the bad karma has cleared.

Ryan and I just got home from 2012, a long but interesting movie. I won’t go into it too much because I may review it on Reviews by Cole. I do have some thoughts about the end of the world. I’m not exactly superstitious or crazy about it but I am open to the idea that something may happen. Life as we know it may come to an end and the thought is pretty scary. I don’t know how but I would prefer to be with my loved ones on December 21 of next year. Just saying.

Of course, a lot of people think it’s a whole lot of nothing. Scientists say that several of the proposed theories are absolute crap and some people argue that either we’re not even reading the Mayan calendar correctly or that it’s be so entirely wrong that it doesn’t matter anyway. Some argue that the calendar simple ends because that’s what calendars do. Yours probably ends on December 31 2009, unless it’s an extended addition. So maybe it’s nothing after all but I’m open to the possibilities.

It’s interesting to think that one could wake up and.. not go to bed the same way one has for a lifetime. I can’t even fathom to end of technology, electricity, the loss of books and art and culture and the sheer drop in human life. The idea is almost too unimaginable to be frightening, yet it scares me a bit. Which is why I was a little anxious to see the movie. It’s hard to imagine what (if anything) comes after life as we know it but the movie did portray a possible sequence of events. Still, I’m not sure if I feel any better about it.

Or if it matters what I think. I’ll just camp out with my husband and kitties and see what happens.