Root Beer Fall

Let me paint you a picture. Imagine I am pouring myself some soda and accidentally drop the 2 liter bottle.. on the living room carpet. Now, imagine I pick it up at lightning speed but it is a particularly fizzy soda and I have not enough time to put the cap back on before it starts fizzing everywhere. Imagine me lunging toward the bathroom because it has the closest sink and setting down the bottle in it, while replacing the cap on the now-full-of-fizz bottle while still retaining most of the soda inside.

Imagine I walk back to the living room with a towel to assess the damage: ocean on the floor, drops of soda on the floor, entertainment center, random boxes, the table and – oh no! – my pizza, the cover of which I had not yet replaced. )=

Imagine me returning to the bathroom so I can put away said bottle of soda to find that it sprayed all over the floor, the tub, the closet door and, yes, the toilet seat (because my roommate never puts down the lid.) Imagine I don’t realize this until I sit down because I’ve had to pee like crazy since before first spilling the soda.

Imagine that I was barefoot and my feet are now sticky. Imagine after jumping in the (soda covered) tub half clothed to rinse them off, I am drying them and drop my clean towel in a pool of soda on the bathroom floor I had failed to clean up.

Imagine my ultimate displeasure at this situation!

-shakes fist at sky*
Damn you!