I’ve stolen this hashtag and image from Nicole who runs BloggerPR. Her vent was a little different than mine will be, but it was a tag that I could immediately relate to. I run four blogs, three of which you might know about this: Her Realm, Reviews by Cole and Lyrical Musings. For the most part, my personal blogs are just that: personal. I write in them when I have time and when I am inspired or impassioned. This has become less and less common lately.
You see, I write for a living. Every day, I pump out between 1,000 and 3,000 words depending on the price I’m paying. Sometimes it’s boring as fuck. Other times it’s just repetitive. I deal with unclear clients, finicky editors, slow Internet connections and requirements that are just absurd for how little people want to pay me. I do this not because I like to but because I need to pay rent. I really don’t hate it. In fact, I’ve gotten some compliments lately on my work ethic and my ability to write. I love this, but I do feel a little jaded about the whole thing because I do it so much.
On top of those thousands of words, I try to write at least one post on Reviews by Cole every day; although, it’s often more like 2. Not all of the content is 100% my words. However, I do write an extra 500 words or so a day. Add on taking, editing and uploading pictures, social media promotion, sending pitches, commenting in blogger groups and everything else I do, and this is a hobby that’s a labor of love. Sure, there’s a little money in it, Â but it started because I like to talk basically. However, to keep up with others, I have to talk more than I’d like. It’s just how it works.
This leaves little time or inspiration for writing poetry or patience enough to write words to come up with a humorous post about my life or a tutorial about WordPress here. I don’t want to type words. I don’t want to see words. I don’t want to think words. I pretty much have stopped reading for fun. I can’t even read blogs anymore. It’s all words, words, words. And I can’t do it.
Even on the one day a week I give myself off from work, I have to blog. That’s where my exhaustion comes in. It doesn’t end. Because even if I am not working, there’s something to be blogged. Even if I am caught up with Reviews by Cole, I have ideas here that I really do want to write, but they all feel like a task.
I guess I need to take a good vacation from it all, but this means I’ll have to write and schedule posts for Reviews by Cole and catch up on work to give me that time off. If I could do all that, I wouldn’t be feeling this way, now would I?
I suppose this is part of the reason that I never wanted to make hobbies into a career. I also suppose this is just part of being a working adult. The working part is exhausting and steals time and energy that we’d like to devote to the things we like to do, instead. At least I am in good company, then.