Decorative Flower
Her Realm, Personal website and blog of Cole
Jan 28

10 Reasons I’m In Love with Darren Hayes

No reason, just silliness!

  1. His voice is the soundtrack to my formative years (and often reminds me of my best friend).
  2. He makes a hot clown.*
  3. He has an adorable accent.
  4. He’s funny and had a great podcast. (RIP).
  5. He’s multitalented.
  6. Have you seen his face?
  7. He likes Star Wars.
  8. I bet we could totally make inappropriate jokes together.
  9. Because he’d be a better husband than my ex.
  10. I am totally just a teenaged girl inside!


Jul 16

Ways In Which I’m Better Than Donald Trump

  • I’m hotter
  • I’m funnier
  • I have more genuine friends
  • I have better hair
  • …and a better face
  • I’m more honest
  • I have more compassion for other people

I also think it’s a safe bet that I have lower cholesterol and blood pressure and that my life expectancy will be longer than his.

In fact, as far as I can tell, the only way in which Mr. Trump bests me is that he was born with more money and has a more moneyed network than I was. Even with that taking into consideration, I still think I have a better shot at a presidency than him.

Sorry, Trumps.

Mar 16

Application To Be Cole’s Friend

People just seem to love me. It might sound arrogant, but people love me more than I tend to love them. I often take more time to warm up to them than they do to me.

And my first impressions are just god awful. I’m not kidding guys.

But I’ve come up with a solution! A quick and mostly pain-free way to determine whether a new person is friendship material. And perhaps even more!

And you, my lucky lab rats friends, can be part of the solution!

Just fill out this hand

So, there you have it, folks. A tried-and-true method to finding friendship in the 21st century.

Jan 22

Sex and Video Games

For a while, I’ve jokingly talked about an analogy that sex (and masturbation) and video games are pretty similar. As I was thinking about it tonight, I became more convinced of my rightness. Grammar FTW. So I decided to sit down and blog about it because, you know, funnies.

In an effort to make this awesome, I asked a friend for ideas. This is the ensuing conversation?

“What makes video games and sex alike”

“I’m usually just playing with myself?”

So that’s a thing, FYI.

How Sex and Video Games Are Alike 

  • Sometimes you just want to watch someone else play.
  • They’re both better when you make noise.
  • It sometimes takes longer than it should to finish.
  • But, sometimes, you finish and wonder what the hell just happened.
  • You blunder through it your first time and hope you’re doing it right.
  • It’s all about finding the right angle.
  • Your hand can cramp up after a while.
  • You often forget to stop to eat or drink.
  • Sometimes you look ridiculous doing it.
  • The  Internet is fully of videos of it.
  • Sometimes you just know you’re not going  to finish.
  • The world likes to view  both as a man’s world — and double standards run rampant in both cultures.
  • Men are constantly creating fantasies in both, and these fantasies typically revolve around unrealistic portrayals of women.
  • Sometimes you just need to stop and shower.

And the most important reason that sex and videos are alike: they’re both better when I play with you. ;)


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