Decorative Flower
Her Realm, Personal website and blog of Cole
Jul 27

A REAL Update

hearing: Rian talking about.. whatever
feeling: Headachey
wanting: No headachey

At first, I was upset and wanted to write a long, friends only (read: Not Rian) entry in my LJ but things are going so well and so much better now that it really wouldn’t be worth dredging up those feelings. For once, I finally feel as though some things are starting to go my way.

Well, lots has happened. We’ll start with Thursday when Tim called me up to be all “Don’t you think there’s something you should be telling us?” From there it escalated, and it became obvious that someone told them I was engaged. Big fucking deal, right? Maybe – if I knew who told. They blamed Liz and she became really upset but turns out, she really couldn’t have told so we think John did. Anyway, a lot of namedropping from me. Bleh.

So she thought I was angry with her, but whether or not she did tell, I’m not and I wasn’t. However, upon hearing (from me) that Liz might’ve told, Grace called her up and yelled at her. To add insult to injury, Mom and Tim also called, reducing Liz to tears, when she later called Grace. -sigh*

On Friday, Tim called again to tell me about how he was all hurt and how after “everything I’ve done for you” I should have had more respect and told him but why would I tell him before Mom and how do I make him, or Mom, understand why I didn’t tell? I certainly didn’t want them to find out through the grapevine but it doesn’t seem as though Mom understands that she isn’t a very good Mom and I have my reasons which were not to hurt either of them but, rather, to protect myself.

Grace and Ginger came over for a bit and it was a nice visit. We were going to head down to the courthouse and get married. (Yay. I wanted to do it Thursday but I slept all day instead. )=) Except, Rian got all nervous and the landlords came over to look at the board on the window which was in the way of the air conditioner. Long story short, putting in the AC was a simpler process than expected and we just got the marriage license so he’d have a couple days to “prepare” or something.

Saturday and Sunday were tumultuous with us fighting and making up equally insanely. Sometimes our relationship is so volatile that it scares me. When it’s good it’s amazing and I can’t fathom it ever being bad but when it’s bad it’s fucking awful and I can’t imagine it being good.

Nevertheless, we returned to the courthouse at 3:00 Monday afternoon and were married in a little courtroom. It was very simple and only Wendy, Sami and Sami’s husband Eric were present. Afterword Wendy, Rian and I headed to Applebees and it was nice. It still hadn’t (and hasn’t) completely sunk in that I’m married and someone’s wife but it’s getting there.

Things have been great between us with lots of little kisses, hugs, cuddling and the like. (= I find myself grinning like an idiot even more at work but I am dreading when he has to leave. I’m about to join him in bed event hough I don’t want to sleep because I don’t want to waste what precious little time I have left with him. )= Letting him go will be quite difficult.

On an unrelated subject, Sami is going to day shift and Fernie will be switching so we don’t have the same days off anymore. This really gives me even less motivation to keep this job, yet I’ve been there so close to a year it seems a shame to leave, at least before I get my vacation. -chuckles* Additionally, I don’t know how worth it, it would be to get a new job when I might not be here all that long.

I finally went down to the DMV and got my temps! Go Cole! Took me long enough but now I have that much out of my way and I’m slowly proceeding through the process of getting my license.


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